In Oblivion.

"But he never meant any of it", Sarah thought to herself.

"Yet he kept coming back" she wondered.

She remembered all the promises Dylan made, including the one that he’ll always take care of her. He made all those promises, but suddenly it seemed as if he never intended to keep them. He just left, without a word, not even a goodbye.

Something stung her deep inside, which created a deep hollow somewhere in her heart.

“It’s only pain”, she thought.

Tears came flooding down her eyes and her throat choked. The night was suffocating and way too long to pass. She wanted to scream out all the pain that brewed turbulence inside her, but the night demanded complete silence. She was tired of bearing the pain. She wanted to rip her heart out; like it had no right to exist. Subsequently, she felt wasted, drained and with the seemingly endless night passing by, she fell asleep.

She woke up to the chirping of birds next morning.

“So the world still exists” She thought sarcastically.

Last night dawned upon her and she tried to bring out some held back tears but her eyes refused to emote. She tried feeling the pain she felt last night but nothing came about. While she should supposedly be crying like a baby, she had apparently no tears left to shed.

She was fine with the numbness; it seemed like the best thing that could have happened to her.  She didn’t even dream the previous night and to her, that meant only one thing…she was as good as dead. A dead who had to survive to see the end; the end of a journey she had been on voyage for so long. But now it was all about survival, “a dead survival”.

 She stood alone amidst a crowd. They were happy, gay, celebrating. It all seemed so impractical to her. Not that she was unhappy about the festivity and celebrations ensuing around her, but it just didn’t affect her anymore; nothing did! She couldn’t connect to the feelings of others. She had no feelings which could be empathized with. So she stood there, just like a spectator.  She was then asked to join in the plays in which men and women were mixing up, singing and dancing to the tunes, teasing each other, laughing to each other’s whispers, eyes gleaming with mischief and more. Nothing touched her anymore. Everything failed to cast its influence. She participated because she was supposed to. She would do it just as a kid would - all instructed and coached. The difference was that she was drained off all naivetés and excitement, which a kid would have exuberated with.

The celebrations continued, without anyone discerning that a dead strolled amongst them. Sometime nearing the end, when the party was high, the music was loud and everybody laughed, chuckled, hooted, danced and enjoyed to their extremes, a man hastily approached her. He was all swayed with the mood and ambience of the festivities. His appeal was genuine and had no hidden intentions. He was chivalrous enough for the ambience’s standards. He called her from behind, playing on the note of a healthy tease. She turned to look back, and looked straight in his eyes, daring him (and also forewarning him at the same time). The soul that had died still lingered somewhere in her eyes and that made him recoil immediately. 

She moved out of the place, out in the dark. She kept walking as far as it took, to be at peace. She did not notice the grave-like darkness, or the dense and equally dark forest that lay alongside the paved-way. She kept walking, oblivious to the danger awaiting her. All her senses had become obsolete. Even her natural instincts had gone silent. Walking like a lifeless creature, she proceeded towards denser nothingness. That’s when suddenly she heard a bone-chilling shriek of a girl, hidden somewhere inside the forest. Sarah ran for the voice that was shrieking out life and death.

As she came closer she heard another voice, a man this time. The voice was repelling, sickening. A voice, that could make anyone feel disgusted. Sarah reached the spot; the girl who was screaming, lay on the ground almost lifeless, her scream had died somewhere deep inside the pain she endured. The man was standing at a distance, prepared to leave. He had a beastly appeal that would urge any innocent one to kill him. He noticed Sarah approaching and like an insatiate predator, he drooled away. He reached for her; it was like a hyena approaching its dead rotten prey; she didn’t budge a step. She had nothing to spare, she had nothing to lose, what can one get from a lifeless creature, which had already emptied everything she had. But she knew that one life lay there waiting to be saved. She looked around the open meadow, scrutinizing like her vision was microscopic. There, at the far corner where the girl lay, lay an empty bottle of vodka. She ran towards it. The man laughed a sickening tease. He ran to reach her; she picked up the bottle, banged and broke it hard on his head. The bottle shattered into pieces on the ground. Bleeding heavy, the man pinned her to the ground, picked up a piece of glass and stabbed it deep alongside her neck and then into her stomach. She tried to shove him back, protest, but couldn’t shout. She was not afraid of losing her life, what she cared for was the other girl's life. She felt a stab or two and then even her physical senses died.

The stabbing stopped abruptly, and something warm wrapped around her, she could feel the comfort it provided. The world in her mind went furling and then that too blacked out. There was only darkness now, dark yet peaceful. Taking away all her pains, all the rock-solid emotions she had kept buried deep inside her heart this long, were being washed away. Then in the tranquility of the darkness, she saw Dylan’s face. He was asking her to come back. He said he had been stupid to let go off her. He said he would not leave her again, would protect her, he was making promises he had made before. Then he faded into that darkness, which summoned her towards something peaceful. The peace it promised was more assuring. Voices kept calling her back, but she forfeited any wish to return to the dead place she had just left.

(to be continued...)
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